Sallie Mae is a bitch.

Sallie Mae is a bitch. Don't take my word for it, just check it out here. There's millions of people who feel the same way about her.
It's way too late for me, Sallie already owns me for the next 50 years. Or until I die.
So I hope you all can understand why I'm all pissed and think that Sallie Mae is a bitch and has f*cked up my FICO score. And this time around, I didn't get a refund check.
And did you ever try calling Sallie to get some sh*t fixed?
You don't ever get to talk to her, she's off in her ivory tower, counting her money. Instead, you get to talk to this guy:

Who basically ate Jollibee for lunch and talks to you while checking his Friendster account pretending to be all "I'm totally living in the states, and talking to you from Sallie Mae's house".
But really is just one of many Filipino call center employees who represent Sallie Mae and basically treat you like a number on their screen.

Next time I see Sallie Mae, I'm going to take her out to dinner and then punch her in the uterus.

And then there's this guy: